It can take years and years of practice to build up a sexual repertoire and skillset to be proud of – but ruining your sex life is worryingly easy. From small bedroom faux-pas to huge oversights, here are seven simple ways to ruin your sex life that we hope you manage to avoid.
1. Scheduled Sexy Time
Booking a set time every week or month for orchestrated sexy time can really take the spark out of sex. Treating sex like an appointment or the weekly big shop is never conducive to romance or eroticism; being impulsive and spontaneous is far more erotic for the majority of people than queuing for a weekly spot of premeditated sex.
2. Stick to the Set List
This is the reason Nirvana’s 1992 performance at Leeds Festival has gone down in history, and why Twin Peaks became a cult TV hit. And it applies to sex as well: rather than running through the same moves in the same order, it’s healthy to try new things and mix things up a little.
3. Stick to the Playlist
Having a dedicated and restricted music playlist for sex is creepy. If you like to play music in the background during sex, create a decent-length playlist with a large selection of songs. Having sex to the same songs every time will increase the sense of routine – potentially risking the decline into a rut.
4. The Pull-Out Promise
Offering the pull-out promise can make sex very tense and worrying as well as incredibly dangerous. No one can relax and enjoy the sex when they’re anticipating misjudged timing. More pertinently, pulling out at the last moment is not a form of safe sex with all the risks of infection and pregnancy remaining the same. Pre-cum can lead to pregnancy and simple genital contact can immediately lead to the spread of infection.
5. Loosen Up With Booze
Whilst a little tipple can help you relax, too much can cause you to be absent from the entire event. Not being able to remember sex is not the greatest confidence-booster for your partner, and potentially dangerous from a safety perspective. Boozed-up sex can also lead to poor performances and difficulty climaxing.
Research from Brown University suggests that many men find it difficult to get erect when under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs.
6. Racing When You Should be Pacing
Unless you’re fitting in a quick, impulsive shag before a prior arrangement and have to finish to a deadline – sex should be drawn out like a French lunch hour. Take your time to try new things and really take your time. Yes, the climax might be the best bit and you want to get their as quickly as possible like a child reaching for the biggest present on Christmas – but taking your time to arrive at that point can make it all the sweeter.
7. Pants Up, TV On
Few things diminish the beauty of the moment you have just shared with your partner faster than pulling your trousers up and popping Take Me Out on the TV. Sex doesn’t have to finish with the orgasm, and spending time 100% focussed on your partner after finishing can help increase your relationship and connection.
Leaving on a positive note, staying protected and safe never ruined sex – so visit the Freedoms Shop or call us now on 020 7685 5977 for a fantastic range of condoms, lubes and more.