There are a lot of lubes out there, take it from us.
Our friends at Freedoms Shop have made it their mission to stock the best selection of sexual health products in the UK, so as you can imagine, they spend their days surrounded by condoms, STI testing kits, dental dams and more. Pretty much nothing fazes them; though we think that may have met their match with some of these totally bonkers lubes!
Here are five of the most unusual, weird, disturbing and daunting (yet brilliant) lubes ever to be invented.
Boink n’ Oink
Presumably designed for use in the AM, Boink n’ Oink is a bacon-flavoured lube for meat lovers and their lovers. It’s a million miles away from the sweet taste of Lubetube’s Cheeky Cherry! Plus, for those who cannot eat bacon due to their religion or personal set of beliefs, Boink n’ Oink lube contains no actual bacon and is 100% kosher and vegan-friendly!
Can’t decide between sex and one last dram before bedtime? Whiskey Dick is the bourbon-flavoured lubricant which means you no longer have to decide. Despite the flavouring and Jack Daniels style box, it is unlikely that the value of the contents will appreciate with age – so it’s better for using than saving for a special occasion.
Red Velvet Cake
The domain of bakers taking that step from wobbly beginner to confident amateur– Red Velvet cakes have grown in popularity over the last 15 years. So it was only a matter of time before a Red Velvet Cake lube was developed.
With a choice of Mai Tai, Amaretto Sour, Bahama Mama, Appletini, Sex on the Beach and Baileys & Cream (for the nans), the cocktail collections from Liquor provides a comprehensive drinks menu.
With a scent like a Dickensian Christmas, the toasted macadamia nuts lube from Intimate Organics promises the ‘nuttiest nuts in all the land’. This lube might be well-suited for those of you who want to avoid the sweetness of fruit lubes but aren’t quite brave enough yet to go whole hog and try the bacon lube.
If none of these zany lubricants are whetting your appetite, the Freedoms lube page is full of flavours and products which cater to a more regular palate. Take a look here